Ashamed describes feeling bad, guilty, or embarrassed about something you did or about some part of yourself. It often makes people want to hide or avoid others.
From Old English “āscamian” meaning “to be ashamed,” related to “shame.” The “a-” prefix marks a state or condition.
Shame is a social emotion: you feel ashamed because, in your mind, other people are watching and judging—even if they aren’t really there. It’s like carrying an invisible audience whose approval suddenly matters a lot.
Social norms have often imposed disproportionate shame on women and girls for sexuality, appearance, and behavior, while excusing similar conduct in men. Language about being "ashamed" has been used to police women’s conformity to gendered expectations.
Use "ashamed" carefully, recognizing that shame is shaped by gendered norms; avoid reinforcing stereotypes that certain feelings or behaviors are more shameful for one gender. When possible, focus on specific actions and impacts rather than global shame about identity.
["regretful","remorseful","uncomfortable about","concerned about"]
Feminist and queer movements have worked to challenge imposed shame—especially around bodies and sexuality—reframing many experiences as socially stigmatized rather than inherently shameful.
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