The quality of being kind, courteous, and charming; elegant politeness and warmth.
From 'gracious' plus '-ness'. 'Gracious' comes from Latin 'gratiosus' (favored, agreeable), which evolved through Old French and Middle English before the '-ness' suffix was added.
Graciousness is what Emily Post and modern etiquette experts teach—it's civility with warmth, not just following rules coldly. A gracious person makes others feel valued, not just correct.
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